"I worked for 30 hours last week!"
"There will be sixteen kids in my class next year!"
"I don't get paid enough to deal with all these languages!"
Just three of the things that the world's highest paid teachers have been saying during the lockdown.
Parent Eliza Hrusku said "We, full time workers are being told to correct our kids' work, and if we don't the teachers get pissy."
"If this keeps happening I'm going to buy them Luxembourgish chocolates at the end of the year instead of Belgian ones. That'll show 'em my feelings."
The Splice proposes that everyone drops their other concerns at this time and spares a thought for Luxembourg's poor teaching community. Why not pool together and get them a package holiday they can take in the two month Summer vacation that's coming up?
The scumbag who steals Nespresso capsules at work is definitely also the fucking snitch in your apartment block.
A painfully long investigation spearheaded by Professor Tact including: common sense, whistleblowing and foxhole digging (but mostly common sense) preceded this revelation.
Prof. Tact said, "We can confirm that the toad-like mother fucker who called the cops when you spoke to a friend through your window is the same piece of shit at work who sends all the auditors your way.
Gasperich resident Eliza Hrusku stated "The Toad Man lets his shrill and hateful children torture the entire building, but if you dare to use the communal tap, he's straight on the phone to the agency."
"What is the solution?" we asked. "A venemous fish to the face?"
"I'll be using him for a future experiment" stated Tact.
"Gonna place a lump of coal in his rectum and get me a diamond!"