Your Guide to Luxembourg Energy Ratings

You are buying your first apartment or house in the Grand Duchy. Here are those enigmatic alphabet energy ratings explained:

G/H - Solid as a rock.  Forget about the ghost in the attic, you don't speak it's language anyway.

F - A few cracks here and there. Outside tap.  Radiators give you migraines.  Has a poltergeist instead of a ghost, so don't leave any kitchen knives out.

C/D/E - Nobody seems to live in one of these!

B - Air is moved from one room to another, WTF??

A - Mould appears (and does not leave).  Garages flood every six months via your cellar.

AAA - Who needs windows?

AAAA - Has a glass ceiling for the arboretum.  Costs thousands of euros per month just to keep everything tropical.