The HR Consultant - (noun) A baseless parasite. A ball of nastiness from the pits of Hades. An over-opinionated, over-qualified fucktard (who hates you).
These people are infecting the Grand Duchy like a plague. An earnest young job seeker expanded on this for the Splice. "I liked the sound of one expanding bank so applied and was happy to be granted an interview. However my rapport with the Managers was warped by the fourth presence in the room, sneering at me like that girl in the Exorcist."
Braving a face to face meeting with one of these creatures, the Splice was informed as follows: "We are programmed to infiltrate CVs and rip them to shreds from the inside out. Bottom line is, we must ridicule the candidates and expose them for the liars that they are."
"A postgraduate degree in Human Resources, studied at a basically free university teaches you to ignore personal circumstances and feelings to concentrate on looking good for the Company who is overpaying you. Economic crisis? Let me get my fucking violin."
The Splice advised the Consultant to take deep breath, and imparted some truth.
"Slow your roll down, and let's strip this right back to basics. "
"You're a little cunt."