A middle-aged Bel-Air man collapsed this morning and was rushed to Urgences at the Robert Schumann-Henry Funck-Andy Schleck Centre Hospitalier de la Croix de Gasperich sur Syr.
Alexander Gribbage received a letter regarding a job he applied for in 1989 and suffered a mild cardiac arrest. “I was at school revising for my finals and thought I’d send an application to Eurotech Technologies, the company I’d just completed work experience with. I thought it was showing initiative.” The Company wrote back saying “Whilst we admire your initiative we are afraid that we have chosen to pursue other more suitable candidates, since you are now 47 years of age.” Helga Offenbacher, The Head of HR who couldn't even be bothered to sign the letter, snorted at the Splice “Oh please, Mr Gribbage will probably demand too many francs! Anyway our Head Office in East Berlin isn’t reachable at the best of times. When they are the lines are bugged". "Will this be all? I have tickets to see Jefferson Airplane.” The Splice just hung up. *Just before going to press it has been announced that a skeleton found by a construction firm in Junglinster was a Luxembourgish person who died of jobshock syndrome. How did we know it was Luxembourgish? It was wearing a Hermes scarf. *Contributed by Peter the Alcoholic Anonymous
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