In response to the Umwelt scheme* and the proposal to extend German road tolls to cars, Luxembourgish parliament is planning to quadruple the price of fuel, coffee, tobacco and alcohol at the faintest hint of a German accent. "We were just going to do it on the Eastern side of the country, but then we also punish the normal, less arrogant Germans who don't work here," said a cross-eyed politician. Asked whether it was enough punishment that Luxembourg breweries monopolize the country and force their piss-poor beer on everyone he said, "You'd think so, but no."
*A scheme brought in during the night, almost certainly while you were sleeping.
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