-A bar in <<insert random Lux town here>> has caused a seismic reaction with dyed-in- the-wool Luxembourgers and residents alike.
Random punter Pascal Keksessen suddenly withdrew from his evening plans last Friday night when he noticed that the rusty Bofferding shield of his local had been replaced.
“I stopped in my tracks, jaw agape” he said. “I walked backwards for a couple of minutes. Curled up into a ball in a bus shelter.”
“The words Bit and Burger have been plaguing my thoughts ever since.”
Dual citizen Peter Elsewhere had similar concerns. “It’s too harrowing to walk into my local and not be around a group of grown men playing skittles. It’s just eerie.”
“Don’t even get me started on the non-chemical beer they were serving.”
When the Splice suggested trying again, Elsewhere sneered, “In my town in the UK if you didn’t paint your house in the local football colours you got what was coming to you.”
The Splice contacted his new pub landlord Rudy Deutschlander for a response, in the interests of fair and balanced reporting. He commented “Bring it! I’ve got a venomous fish to smack that asshole with whenever he wants!”
Keksessen meanwhile, has been catatonic ever since his shock discovery. One night at 4 A.M. he whispered to himself, “It’s 1940 again.”