THE LUXEMBOURG SPLICE
  • Home
  • NEWS
  • Contact

STOP ASKING EX-PAT DATE ABOUT RESTAURANTS

2/28/2018

0 Comments

 
Picture
Your upcoming date is sick to death of being asked what they think of their nationality's restaurants in Luxembourg. If you are not the first person to do that they will hate you.

Mostly shit, with one or two surprises is your answer.  At worst you'll get a slap, at best a deep breath and an eye roll. 

The Splice embarked on a survey into restaurants in Luxembourg so you don't have to.  Some of the more common responses are printed beneath*:

Italian - Basically student food.  Let us know when they start stocking Peroni and Moretti.  LIKE EVERY OTHER ITALIAN RESTAURANT IN THE FUCKING WORLD.

Chinese - Cooked in pre-prepared sauces, microwaved and dumped back out the following day.  Once you've left do you think they eat that crap??

Japanese - Chinese people selling you staid sushi rolls you can get in the supermarket.  But because they come out on a revolving belt like a model train you'll happily pay €20+.

Indian - Fattening, but at least you can get a decent beer.

British - An 'English' breakfast served from 10:30AM for €16?  Fuck off.

Portuguese - Actually quite good.

Just take him or her to an arthouse movie at the Cinematheque (cheap) and a drink in the city centre (not so cheap).  Its not fucking rocket science people.

*The responses of a visiting couple from Zurich were not included as they were not really in the scope of the survey.  They commented, "Who gives a fuck?  We're enjoying how cheap this third world country is!  We're thinking of buying a block of apartments and leaving it empty just for a laugh."
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Archives

    June 2022
    May 2022
    February 2022
    December 2021
    October 2021
    August 2021
    June 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.
  • Home
  • NEWS
  • Contact