STOP ASKING EX-PAT DATE ABOUT RESTAURANTS

Your upcoming date is sick to death of being asked what they think of their nationality's restaurants in Luxembourg. If you are not the first person to do that they will hate you.

Mostly shit, with one or two surprises is your answer.  At worst you'll get a slap, at best a deep breath and an eye roll. 

The Splice embarked on a survey into restaurants in Luxembourg so you don't have to.  Some of the more common responses are printed beneath*:

Italian - Basically student food.  Let us know when they start stocking Peroni and Moretti.  LIKE EVERY OTHER ITALIAN RESTAURANT IN THE FUCKING WORLD.

Chinese - Cooked in pre-prepared sauces, microwaved and dumped back out the following day.  Once you've left do you think they eat that crap??

Japanese - Chinese people selling you staid sushi rolls you can get in the supermarket.  But because they come out on a revolving belt like a model train you'll happily pay €20+.

Indian - Fattening, but at least you can get a decent beer.

British - An 'English' breakfast served from 10:30AM for €16?  Fuck off.

Portuguese - Actually quite good.

Just take him or her to an arthouse movie at the Cinematheque (cheap) and a drink in the city centre (not so cheap).  Its not fucking rocket science people.

*The responses of a visiting couple from Zurich were not included as they were not really in the scope of the survey.  They commented, "Who gives a fuck?  We're enjoying how cheap this third world country is!  We're thinking of buying a block of apartments and leaving it empty just for a laugh."